Sunday, August 9, 2020

The (Last) Day

I don't want to see my Brain Fit clients for forever.  That's right- I want there to be a "last day". I want my clients to get to a point where they are ready to stop seeing me, to stop participating in Brain Fit.

Why do I want that? Why do I look forward to that day? It's because that means that the child is ready.

They are ready to do it on their own. 

I want to help my clients in a way that empowers them to be ready for that last day with me. I want to give them the wings that will allow them to fly on their own.

I want my clients to leave with multiple movements tools that have become favorites. I want them to leave with their primitive reflexes integrated. I want them to leave when they feel ready to leave.

Now, this is not to say that the "last day" is an easy one for me. By the time that day comes, I have developed a relationship with the child. And, I developed a relationship with the parents and family as well. One of the things that I love about working as a coach at Brain Fit is that one-on-one connection that gets built with the client. However, it does make it hard to leave when the time comes. Going from seeing the child on a regular basis, to not at all- or maybe to just seeing pictures on them on Facebook (because their mom and I have connected there) can be hard on me too.

Sometimes, that last day comes before I feel like we're ready.  It may be due to financial constraints of the family, or maybe they move, or some other situation that is out of their control.  It's these times that are the hardest- when the last day comes before I feel like I've fully given the child their wings- when I know there is still work to be done. Remember, I want to empower my client to be able to fly on their own, and I want to know that we have completed the work we set out to do. 

Now, I don't want anyone to think that I'm blaming anyone for a situation like that- having to stop before it's "time". I'm just letting you know that occasionally it does happen and that's ok.  Sometimes, the child comes back- for "tune-ups" as we call them, and sometimes they don't. It's all in the nature of the business.  

Regardless, during the time that I work with the client, during that time we have together, I promise that I do my best to help to empower the child to be ready to leave. As I mentioned in my last blog post, I meet them where they are and move them forward.  And, make no mistake- we always move forward.  We always make progress on those wings. 

During my last session with kids, we often come up with a goal that they are able to use the tools I taught them.  That they can use the tools to help themselves, even when I'm not around. That's what we set out to do from the beginning so it just makes sense to me that that is where we end. Set up the brain and body to be ready for that last jump from Brain Fit to flying on their own!

The other piece to the last day is the parents and I would be remiss if I didn't mention them. As I said above, I often develop a nice relationship with the parents (most often the mother) as well. The last day can be hard on them too. I get it. It was hard on me when it was my son's last day with his coach- although we do keep coming back for "tune-ups" now and again- lol.

As a parent, you develop a relationship with the coach yourself.  I looked forward to conferring with her about my son. I looked forward to talking to her, mom-to-mom, parent-to-parent.  It's a connection with another adult that has also come to understand your child. Another adult that understands their difficulties and that wants to help them just as much as you do.  To lose that yourself- for the parent, can be hard too.  

But you know what? Just because I don't see the child anymore, doesn't mean I'm gone forever.  Parents can come for tune-ups as well. And, as I said- I may have connected with them through Facebook or texts .  I would like to think that not only have I given the child wings, but the parents as well.  And if it's the parent (rather than the child) that has trouble flying at some point in the future? Well, I'm only a text away and am willing to help.

I want my clients to have a last day.  I look forward to it for them! I want to know that together, we did the work and that they are ready to fly on their own.

The last day may make me sad, but it also warms my heart knowing that the time came when they were ready for me to let them go. 

And then? I get to watch them fly...